What makes communication difficult? It is a question raised by many people during their life.
Communication is based on the transfer of messages from a transmitter to a receiver, a speaker to a listener. The transmission of messages can be hindered by various factors. What can we do in order to communicate better?
1.Listen carefully to our partner which means that we don’t think of our answer while he is talking to us, we won’t criticize what he says, we won’t try to impose our point of view.
2.We don’t interrupt our companion while he is talking to us. Let him express his thought and then respond.
3.If we haven’t understood what our partner told us then we can ask him for details: Either by telling him that this point of view is not clear to us or by repeating his words in order to make sure that we have understood correctly what he wants to tell us.
4.We need to be specific when we express our opinion without making assumptions about what our partner may want to tell us and without criticizing him.
5.We must express our opinion in first person. For example, “I think”, “ I have the impression”, “I feel”. In this way we show that it is our opinion.
6.We should try to put ourselves in his shoes so that we are aware of how he feels when we express our thoughts and desires.
7.The tone of our voice, our posture and facial expressions need to be related with what we say.
8.We express our positive thoughts and feelings when we start talking to our partner so that he can accept our complaints easier. In this way our partner won’t be defensive to us.
9.We focus on “the here and now” without making references to the past.
10.We should be able to listen to another opinion even if we believe we are right. Otherwise we deprive ourselves of being able to see all the shades of gray and not only black&white.