During the day we feel different emotions. They can be positive such as joy, gratitude, optimism or negative such as anger, frustration, anxiety etc. How are these feelings formed?
One might reply that our feelings are the result of the situations that we experience. Is it like that?
The answer is that our feelings are the result of how we interpret the situations that we face. For example within a couple the wife could feel angry if her husband delayed to come home provided that she thought that he isn’t interested in her or feel anxious provided that she thought that something bad happened to him. If she wanted to change her emotional state in order to feel calm she could alternatively think that her husband delayed to come home because something unexpected or important took place and that he usually informs her if he is going to be late. We can realise that our feelings vary even if the situation is the same because of the different thoughts that precede.
Anyone could take a self-control test and ask himself what goes through his mind at the moment that he feels that way. Do it as an exercise. Keep a diary of your daily activities where you will write your thoughts and how you feel in relation to the events you experience in order to realize how your thoughts affect your emotions. In this way can you see if your thoughts are realistic, if they are extreme (dichotomous thinking), if they are based on «must», if they tend to focus on some details and omit others, if they tend to overestimate or devaluate yourself. This awareness helps with changing your thoughts only if you really want to focus on the different aspects of yourself.
In conclusion it can be said that thoughts are the driving force behind the magical world of emotions.